Big Kid Things: The Nearly Three Edition

We’re at the end of the age of two.  That means that when he turns three he’ll be completely agreeable and well behaved all the time, right?  RIGHT?

From what I hear three is the new two.  And if that’s true then we’re in for a real treat.

I’ll start with the good: Max is potty trained!  And he has been since December!  AND! He did it all by himself!ThreeEdition_04Seriously though, he really did.  I gave him underwear, or unduway as he calls them, and he would wear them around the house and go pee in the potty (his little potty seat).  Then one day when I said he needed to put a diaper on because we were leaving the house he said no.  I panicked for a moment then told myself this day was going to come sooner or later.  So we left the house with him in underwear.  And he did just fine.  Then a few days later as he was getting ready for bed he said no to putting a diaper on for bed.  I trusted him and let him wear underwear and he woke up dry!  I was blown away.  He was ready.

He went over a month without any accidents at all.  He’s wet the bed a couple of times and recently seems to have regressed and is having accidents all the time now.  But I think that’s more of a Eff You to us because when we see that he needs to go we tell him to go and he says “No.  I don’t want to!”.  And then we argue and there’s timeouts for everyone.  And that seems to be the theme recently.ThreeEdition_03I feel like we’re living in a constant power struggle.  He knows what he can get away with and with who.  He plays me and Rob differently.  It’s kind of funny.  Except that it’s not really and some days you want to drop everything and leave.

But then he starts asking you where the cats are and unless you are myself or Rob you will have no idea what the hell he’s talking about.  You see, Max has an entire family of cats for imaginary friends.  There’s a mommy cat, a daddy cat, a Max cat and a baby cat and they are all named Tree.  Is it their last name you ask?  Who knows.  To us they’re just the Tree cats.  They come with us everywhere and they love to play chase.

While he can be just precious and talk about imaginary cats, he can also test your patience and make you feel like your brain is going to explode.ThreeEdition_01He’s opinionated and knows what he wants, or doesn’t want.  For a while anytime we asked him to do something it was “No.  I don’t want to.”  Okey dokey, Max.  We resorted to bribery, it was literally the only thing that would get him to go to the bathroom, or get dressed, or even EAT.  For the most part we’re past that, for now.  Every once in a while we have to make some sort of deal, and let me tell you that this kid can drive a hard bargain.  Now he’s really into us setting the timer on our phone for a number of minutes of his choosing.  Then he’ll do what we want when the time goes off, supposedly.  I’ve seen no evidence of this.

He’s not napping anymore, which has turned out to be okay.  Basically, he’s so tired at bedtime he just goes right to sleep.  It’s glorious!  No more sitting next to his bed for hours, no more standing outside his door for hours!  The downside?  He’s awake all day.  And in the early evening he gets pissy.  Then I get pissy.  And then I have wine.  Or beer or bourbon.  Whatever’s closest.ThreeEdition_02While he’s a pain in my backside, he’s also just the most fun right now.

Listening to him talk is incredible.  Especially after he had such a hard time with it.  He’s officially done with speech therapy and I’m so so so glad we put him in that program.

Since he’ll be three in less than two weeks we’re looking into preschool.  We visited a cooperative preschool last week and I think we’re going to sign him up.  He’ll only be there for two months, as they follow the school districts calendar.  He was shy at first but warmed up eventually and didn’t want to leave.  I know that when the time comes to drop him off there will be tears.  His and mine.  I also know that it won’t last forever and that this is the best thing for him, and me for that matter.

His 3rd birthday is five days away and I’m starting to feel all the feelings.  He has requested a red cake for his birthday and for dinner he would like hot dogs.

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